I AM the Christmas

"“I know that Messiah is coming” (the one called Christ); “whenever that one comes, he will proclaim all things to us.” Jesus said to her, “I, the one speaking to you, am he." John 4

i don't want to celebrate Christmas this year. 

i don't want trappings if the spirit is dead.  Slain.  Murdered.

i don't want to hang reminders of things done, of years past, of a long ago event in history.  This is not a feast of celebration.  This is not a joyous remembrance.  This is not ritual.  i don't want to spend money i don't have on things no one needs.  i have no use for tradition.  Symbol.  Emptiness.  Hollowness.  Glass balls with nothing inside which only show me distorted reflections.  Reams of torn paper and discarded boxes but no real gifts.  Jolly fat men who bring Lexuses to rich people.  French perfumes to cover the reek of death.

This is Passover night.  The first one.  This is darkness complete with fearful anticipation.  This is a hasty meal with belts on, sandals laced, bags packed and walking staff in hand.  This is shepherds sleeping outside.  This is a disturbed kingdom.  This is a world torn apart by war, famine, pestilence and demagogues.  i have no reason to sing carols.  i don't want to deck halls.  i have no use for religion.

i need Christ to come.  i need God With Us.  This is not Bah Humbug.  i don't want less Christmas.  i want MORE!  i don't want the holiday.

i want the Man!