Correction: Any father who does not weep when he hears Harry Chapin's "Cat's in the Cradle" may yet be worthy of the title, he may just be really bitter about his own dad.
i was reminded, after my last post, of the power which words possess. Which is somewhat interesting given that the original premise of my post was on the power of some words, albeit set to music but i don't think i choke up because of the chord progression of Chapin's guitar.
But the power of chords or words is nothing to the swords of action. A reality that pierced my skull in a four hour car ride the other day. My swashbuckling driver and host and unwitting teacher was explaining some of the things his church has done in the past year or so. Knowing that i was seeking a new crew of crazies to worship Dad with, he meant it as a plug for his own. It was a fairly successful plug cuz when it comes to putting boots on the ground, his crew of crazies is training marines. As he talked, i realized that it was due largely to the force of this Deacon's personality and skill set. Deacons, in my mind, are the blue collar branch of a church. They were created when the church had to come to grips with the gripes of some greek grandmas. The Apostles quickly remembered that Jesus showed them that feeding the soul was indivisible from feeding the tummy. Being men of action, the Apostles lost no time in appointing someone else to take care of it. And thus were born the Deaconate. Those that don't talk about Christ's love, they show it.
And that brings me to the point i was trying to make with the last post... what do i show my sons? Many things i'm sure but there's a few i'd like to fix...
- i show them that Lacrosse trumps church when we skip one to attend the other
- that trying is futile when i give up on my dreams
- that work is cursed when i constantly curse my work
- i show them how to destroy oneness and unity in marriage and to be an adversarial husband when i fight with my wife in front of them
- i can see how my attitudes have passed on the idea that we are little people who are at the mercy of forces much greater than us. We can't fight city hall, fate, big business or the river.
- i teach them incorrect roles for a man when i ignore my responsibilities and let others pick up my slack
- i teach them that the computer is more important than they are when i miss what they are telling me because i'm "doing something."
and on that note, i'm gonna go make them lunch and put a picture on a post-it in their bags so that i can at least teach them that i love them. Maybe that's all i can hope to accomplish.