Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Spiritual Weirdness

So i done something last week that i never done afore.  i fasted.  

i'd always thought fasting sounded weird.  What did not eating have to do with anything?  It sounded kind of shamanish.  Like going on a visionquest or something.  Or at best, smacked of works.  Look God, look how pious i am, i'm fasting!  Aaaaabaloney.  

But i'd read a book by Don Miller that got me thinking.  Not about fasting but about how i was living my life.  i needed time to pray, i needed time to go up on the mountain and consider this God i claim to love and serve.  Unfortunately i've never been able to make time stop and/or my boss spontaneously give me time off for spiritual renewal.  So i had to somehow take the time i had and use it well.  Also, not a speciality of mine.

Enter fasting.  I was skeptical but it really helped me focus.  Whenever i thought about feeding my fat, MnM eating arse, i would pray instead.  It was so simple that it was almost elegant.  i stopped thinking about me so much and more about prayer.

i did that for two days when i took a gift of an oatmeal cookie as a sign that it was time to end the fast.  i guess at that time i was kind of getting superstitious about this, cause i started kind of looking for some kind of revelation.  Some kind of nut to take away from all of this.  Some kind of change of scenery or kind of a metamorphosis in some kind of me.  

i kind of didn't get one.  So i kinda got a little grumpy.  

Yeah, very Jonah of me.  Didn't get the answer i wanted so i pouted and kicked stuff and went to bed all down and depressed.  Felt bad about that, prayed about it the next morning, which led me to pray for all sorts of people and that led me to ....ta dah!  A revelation!

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